Pardon My Past

                People are like dice. Each person has multiple sides. I don’t mean they have multiple personalities, but they do have different parts that make them whole. There are different parts that may seem incompatible, but they all come together in some form to make an entire being. One of my favorite shows as a kid, and even as an adult, was the show Charmed. I’ve mentioned it in some of my earlier blogs.

                In season two, one of the main characters, Piper Halliwell, is talking to her boyfriend Dan. She is arguing with him about her pervious love interest. She tells Dan, “I come with a past. We all do. It’s a package. It’s one that I would like to share with you, but you can’t pick and choose.” I really like what she is saying here. You can’t pick and choose what parts of a person to love. Well not if you truly love them. It’s like saying that you love their arms, but not their legs. Both are parts of that person.

                This message really hit home for me this week. I recently had a birthday. On that day I became twenty-one. This is supposed to be a pretty exciting birthday, or so I am told. I’ve been dreading it since I moved back home. I love my family. I really do, but sometimes I feel like they are picking and choosing only certain parts of me to love. They only like the parts of me that fit into their life style. My aunt is a devout Mormon, and she believes that I should behave the way her religion says I should. It’s not really fair because it’s not my religion nor is it my beliefs. It makes me think that she only loves the parts of me that conform to that set of rules, but those aren’t the only parts of me. I love tattoos. I have twelve, and I am still going strong. I also enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage. I’m always careful. I don’t drink and drive. I don’t get so drunk that I am incapable of taking care of myself. However, if she knew these different sides of me she would probably shun me. Same could be said for my dad. Again I love the guy, but I can never seem to make him happy.

                So I have recently decided to take a page out of dear Piper’s book. It is not okay for my family to pick what parts of me they like and discard the others. They either get all of me or none of me. I have spent most of my life trying to make others happy…even to the point of making myself miserable. Here is the lesson for all of you: be honest with yourself. If you are attempting to change yourself to fit others vision of who you should be…knock it off. You are who you are. Be that person and own it.